The occasion I had originally been thinking about was when I was around 3 years old. I was the third of four children, with the eldest four years older, and the youngest only 17 months younger than me. It was possibly the first time my mother decided that my young brother could get in the bath with the rest of us – yes, all four in the bath at the same time. The older two of my siblings decided that I would not fit and so I was not allowed in the bath with them – Mum had headed off elsewhere by this time. I was left out of the bath.
Apart from being unhappy about this, or maybe because of being unhappy, I started playing the fool. I put a pillow case over my head and started moving towards my bed in sight of the bathroom door. I fell and hit my chin on the metal frame of the bed – blood everywhere. I cannot remember much else about the incident, apart from feeling left out as they would not let me in the bath.
My siblings soon learnt that I could be easily teased, with two or three picking on me at a time. My parents kept telling me that they would stop if I stopped reacting. This did not really help as I still felt I was left out – three against one.
The final thing I remember was because of my hair – my sister’s hair was curly, my mother’s hair was curly, and at least one of my brothers had a bit of a wave in his hair (and of course boys had straight hair anyway). Mine was straight without a wave of any kind. I always wanted curly hair. Mum did the old rags for curling hair, but it would not stay curly for long. Here was I, being picked on by my siblings, and looking different from them. I firmly believed that I must have been adopted! Of course, I was NOT!
I was not the odd one out in the family, I only thought I was different. Today, when looking in the mirror, all I can see is my mother’s face. My state of thought had made me feel different and the odd one out.
Joy Shirley
July 2017