Right Here I am siting in my Benalla home of almost 58 years, and Right Now I am in my 93rd year of living.
My wife, Bernadette, and I both are in excellent health and enjoy a relaxed retirement. We are, indeed, a fortunate couple.
As one would expect, because of my age, I ponder the future - how long do I still have to live???, I ponder the past - could I have done better in life???
What of the future? - My death must be imminent. Is there an after-life? My Catholic upbringing tells me that there is, - but the seemingly, general belief is that there is a nothingness!
My faith puts me in a quandary!!
And so, I ponder the past and the many injustices which I endured.
I was the youngest of seven siblings. I am the only surviving one.
My mother died of cancer when I was 4 years old. My father was an alcoholic (whether through his own fault or not I don’t dare to guess). His sisters determined that he was not capable of caring for his young family, aged 18yrs, 16 yrs, 13 yrs, infant death, 9yrs, 6 yrs and 4 yrs. Consequently we all went in our different directions and didn’t have the opportunity to grow as a family.
One of dad’s sisters belonged to the hierarchy of the nuns, (Sisters of Mercy), therefore I was sent to be housed and educated at Villa Maria, a boy’s boarding school/home in Ballarat East, until at grade 8 I obtained my merit certificate. I then gained a scholarship which entitled me to accommodation and tutorial at St.Patrick’s College, also in Ballarat.
School holidays were spent with my aunts and uncles. Of them all, Aunty Kath and Toby O’Shannessy, and Uncle Ned Caine were the only ones who showed me any affection. Aunty Kath was absolutely wonderful. Generally I felt unloved. Consequently I have always felt envious of people with mothers.
I don’t have the words to describe the emptiness of a life without a mother.
Now, having a loving wife in Bernadette and four children of my own, family means much more to me.
One can have ups and downs in life but a positive attitude is a ‘must’.
Which brings me back to the point ‘RIGHT NOW’.
Right now, I can possibly take the opportunity to make some suggestions, or maybe to give some ‘wise words’-
Mothers are ‘special persons’ who love you unreservedly. Repay that love twofold.
Always consider your family before others
Don’t undervalue yourself. You are as good, or even better than others.
There is always some good in everyone.
No matter how disadvantaged you may be, there is always somebody worse off.
Develop a good work ethic.
There is no substitute for hard work.
Be prepared to ‘walk that extra mile’.
Develop an enquiring mind.
We all make mistakes. Acknowledge your own.
Tomorrow is ‘another day’.
DON’T “dwell on” or “stew over” an injustice to you.
Think positively.
Be truthful.
Don’t be too outspoken, but have your say.
Look people ‘in the eye’ when shaking hands.
In making these suggestions, I am re-iterating some advice I have given to my grandchildren. You may, or may not, agree.
Ray O’Shannessy
November 2024
My wife, Bernadette, and I both are in excellent health and enjoy a relaxed retirement. We are, indeed, a fortunate couple.
As one would expect, because of my age, I ponder the future - how long do I still have to live???, I ponder the past - could I have done better in life???
What of the future? - My death must be imminent. Is there an after-life? My Catholic upbringing tells me that there is, - but the seemingly, general belief is that there is a nothingness!
My faith puts me in a quandary!!
And so, I ponder the past and the many injustices which I endured.
I was the youngest of seven siblings. I am the only surviving one.
My mother died of cancer when I was 4 years old. My father was an alcoholic (whether through his own fault or not I don’t dare to guess). His sisters determined that he was not capable of caring for his young family, aged 18yrs, 16 yrs, 13 yrs, infant death, 9yrs, 6 yrs and 4 yrs. Consequently we all went in our different directions and didn’t have the opportunity to grow as a family.
One of dad’s sisters belonged to the hierarchy of the nuns, (Sisters of Mercy), therefore I was sent to be housed and educated at Villa Maria, a boy’s boarding school/home in Ballarat East, until at grade 8 I obtained my merit certificate. I then gained a scholarship which entitled me to accommodation and tutorial at St.Patrick’s College, also in Ballarat.
School holidays were spent with my aunts and uncles. Of them all, Aunty Kath and Toby O’Shannessy, and Uncle Ned Caine were the only ones who showed me any affection. Aunty Kath was absolutely wonderful. Generally I felt unloved. Consequently I have always felt envious of people with mothers.
I don’t have the words to describe the emptiness of a life without a mother.
Now, having a loving wife in Bernadette and four children of my own, family means much more to me.
One can have ups and downs in life but a positive attitude is a ‘must’.
Which brings me back to the point ‘RIGHT NOW’.
Right now, I can possibly take the opportunity to make some suggestions, or maybe to give some ‘wise words’-
Mothers are ‘special persons’ who love you unreservedly. Repay that love twofold.
Always consider your family before others
Don’t undervalue yourself. You are as good, or even better than others.
There is always some good in everyone.
No matter how disadvantaged you may be, there is always somebody worse off.
Develop a good work ethic.
There is no substitute for hard work.
Be prepared to ‘walk that extra mile’.
Develop an enquiring mind.
We all make mistakes. Acknowledge your own.
Tomorrow is ‘another day’.
DON’T “dwell on” or “stew over” an injustice to you.
Think positively.
Be truthful.
Don’t be too outspoken, but have your say.
Look people ‘in the eye’ when shaking hands.
In making these suggestions, I am re-iterating some advice I have given to my grandchildren. You may, or may not, agree.
Ray O’Shannessy
November 2024
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