She wrote a book of her life, from which some of the earlier reminiscences in this story come. It appears she was quite an opportunistic girl in that she would help herself to a mouthful of vinegar from the local shop (her mother would smell her breath when she came home). I believe that she used her pocket money to buy lollies at the local corner shop, which wasn’t allowed by her strict mother.
Successful at high school, my mother was one of the first students from her school to sit the School Certificate in the fifth form and passed well. She went onto Matriculation (university entrance qualification), the Year 12 equivalent today, and was runner up Dux for her school.
Unfortunately, in 1946, her father suddenly died from peritonitis, leaving her mother as a single mother of two young girls, 16 and 10. This became a new change in responsibility for a 16 year old.
As my grandmother couldn’t drive at the time, my mother achieved her driver's licence and was the driver for the family. Her mother was a great role model, having had to support her family of two girls after the end of WW2. Unheard of at the time, her mother went out and got a job to support the family, hard times.
My mother completed high school and elected to go to University in Christchurch in the South Island to become a teacher, as did a few of her very close friends. She had a wonderful time at university and teachers college, where she was involved in rowing as a cox and many other university activities.
Sent on several teaching assignments, she was eventually offered one in a little town in central North Island of New Zealand, called Kakahi, in the King Country. All the locals were supportive of this young woman, even trying to marry her off to one of the local farmers (my father, Henry Davey). They eventually married and I was the first of five children.
However, being the wife of a farmer after the second world war wasn’t without its challenges. She became a teacher in our local farming community (I was one of her students, a real horror of a child!!). My father stated that he couldn’t be seen to not being able to support his wife and family, so she had to give up her chosen career. This was doubly challenging in that three of her fellow students at high school went on to achieve their degrees and become Principals of exclusive girls schools in New Zealand, very high profile positions in their communities.
My mother carried on, raised five children, supported her family and encouraged me to go to University to achieve what she hadn’t at the time (I became the only university graduate in the family until, many years later, she completed her degree).
Years later my father had a massive stroke, so my mother became his full time carer for 20 years. Before that they had volunteered for Volunteer Service Abroad and were sent to PNG for two years. They also wanted to travel in their retirement. This was cut short, although they did come to Australia to see us several times and go around Aussie twice!!
When my father was placed into an aged care facility (owned by my sister), my mother finally achieved her travel dreams and spent many years travelling all over, including Russia, Africa, UK and Europe.
In summary, as a woman who had to become responsible as a family member after her father died, to achieving her teaching qualifications and degree, raising five children plus travelling and caring for my father, I applaud her (although she was a grumpy old woman in later years!!!) for being a woman of her generation and achieving what many women of that generation didn’t have the chance to achieve.
James Davey
March 2024