Not long before my first marriage in 1973, my mother said to me that it wouldn’t last.  At the time, I didn’t ask her what she meant by that and now it’s much too late.  I wish I had asked her when I had the chance.  Perhaps she saw something in my future husband that I couldn’t, or perhaps wouldn’t, see.
 
He was a controlling sort of guy, wanting to know who I was spending time with and who I was talking to when he wasn’t around.  He also demanded that his dinner be on the table when he got home from work, saying that I knew precisely when that was going to be.  Problem with that was that he didn’t keep regular hours and would come home, it seemed, when he felt like it.
 
We both worked for his father’s wholesale grocery business.  He trained as a computer programmer and, as my previous employment involved typing, I was designated as the computer operator issuing invoices for the drivers when doing their deliveries, among other things in the office. 
 
Little did I know at that time that he had a girlfriend on the side.  His family and friends all lied for him and nobody told me the truth about his shenanigans.  This included the night our son was born.  I was told that he went to the pub, but he was with the girlfriend, who he married 3 months after our divorce became final.  I found out later that that marriage didn’t work out either.  Perhaps he was up to his old tricks.
 
In the end, I had enough of his bullying tactics and mental stress so I packed up my son and some things and walked out on him.  I did not regret this decision one little bit.
 
After another couple of failed relationships, I finally found success.
 
I was working as a volunteer on HMAS Castlemaine at Williamstown when one day, while on the gangway, a fellow came on board and said that he wanted to offer his services as a volunteer.  When he was walking away from me, my first thought was “hmmm, cute bum”, but I think I said it aloud.
 
It took quite a few months before we started going out together.  The main thing I remember about this is the fact that we went on a holiday to America together.  We both said that it would “make or break” the relationship.  Fortunately, it definitely “made” the relationship and it was a further few years before he proposed.  He did this while I was driving and nearly ran off the road, it was so unexpected.  We both said that we didn’t want to go through marriage again.  Famous last words.
 
We married in 1999 in Caulfield Park and had nearly 15 years together, until his untimely death in 2014.  He was too young, only 64.


Joan Brown
​March 2023

It would have been mid to late August 1988 when a friend’s father approached us and asked if we would be willing to man phones for “a day or two” down at Station Pier, in readiness for the arrival of the Tall Ships which were due to arrive early September.  We both said that we would like to do that.  Little did we know at that time that his “day or two” would become just over 2 weeks.
 
For our first couple of days, we started at about 9am, but once the ships were in port, our days started at 7.30 – 8.00am and usually didn’t finish until 9.00pm or later.
 
One of the most asked questions was “when can I see the American ship ‘Eagle’ and will she be open to the public” to which we had to say that she wasn’t in Melbourne, only Sydney and wasn’t going to be coming here at all.  Other questions included “what time can the ships be viewed”, “are they going to be open to the public”, “what ships are in port”, etc.
 
Some of the ships that did come to Melbourne were Juan Sebastian de Elcano (Spain), Dar Mlodziezy (Poland), Asgard II (Ireland), Leeuwin (Fremantle), Anna Kristina (Norway) and Falie (Netherlands).  The Juan Sebastian was rarely opened to the public, having an armed sentry on the gangway 24/7, while the crew of the Dar Mlodziezy were only too happy to show people around and “practice their English”.
 
On occasion, some of the crews would “practice” their skills climbing the rigging and furling the sails.  It was interesting to watch the speed in which these tasks were accomplished and there were quite a few gasps from the people watching.  Fortunately, none of the crew members slipped or fell during these exercises.
 
A funny thing happened one night.  A former work colleague of Jill’s had joined the Police and told us that at no time would we ever see her in uniform.  I was sitting facing the window when someone swaggered past.  I motioned for Jill to follow me outside, where we “sprung” Karen in uniform.  The poor girl wanted the floor to open up and swallow her.  We then had to explain the situation to her colleagues, who all thought it was quite funny, except for Karen, who was rather embarrassed by the whole incident.
 
It was sad to see the ships sail out of Melbourne, but it was a quite rewarding experience and one that will stay with me.


Joan Brown
February 2025